Monday, June 15, 2009
5 Positive Leadership Strategies
These are uncertain times. Employees are questioning how their industry and job will be impacted by the current economy. They’re unsure about what action to take. Unfortunately this uncertainly creates what I call a VOID and my theory is that where there is a VOID negativity will fill it.
When there is a void of clear and positive communication people start to assume the worst and act accordingly. At the root, it's all about fear. When we are uncertain, fear and negativity creep in and dominate our thoughts, behavior and actions. This leads to a lack of trust, decreased productivity, poor focus, uninspired teamwork and sub-par performance. Instead of taking positive actions to thrive our teams go into survival mode and just try to survive.
That’s why I believe now, more than ever, is a time for positive leadership. Now is a time to stop obsessing about the recession, get back to basics, create a plan of action, and inspire, encourage and empower your teams. Why? Having worked with countless leaders over the years in businesses, schools and professional sports I’ve realized that great leadership is first and foremost a transfer of belief. So often the difference between success and failure is belief. Positive leaders share their belief, optimism, vision, purpose and plan with their organization and in the process they inspire and empower their teams to believe, act and execute. Positive beliefs lead to powerful plans and actions and this leads to significant results.
However, positive leadership requires more than inspirational speeches. It is a process and there are several steps you need to take to get your team on the bus and moving in the right direction.
1. Make Your Culture a Priority:
Negativity and fear are knocking your people off balance. It’s time to regroup, refocus, and unite them to create a winning culture and team environment. Remember, you win in the office first. Then you win in the marketplace. With a winning team you create strength on the inside that can withstand the negativity, naysayers and adversity on the outside.
I saw this happen first hand with Atlanta Falcons last season. In the face of the Michael Vick scandal, Coach Mike Smith took charge and built a winning team by making the team culture, attitude and synergy his priority. I was brought in to help with this process and we saw and immediate and powerful impact.
2. Share a Positive Vision:
It has to be clear, bold and simple so that that everyone in your organization can understand and rally around it. It also has to be relevant to the challenges you have faced and the direction you must go. As a leader you must share this vision every day with everyone in your organization and encourage your managers and employees to do the same. Invite everyone on the bus and energize them towards a common vision, goal and destination.
3. Develop a Fleet of Bus Drivers:
Once you share the vision and invite everyone on the same bus then it’s essential that each person in your organization understand how they can contribute to this vision. This empowers each person to drive their own bus and generates a fleet of bus drivers with your organization all moving in the same direction with a shared vision, focus and purpose.
4. Fill the VOID...Often:
Leaders, you must personally meet with your company and continually share your vision for the future and your fiscal status. Now is not a time to be in your office. Now you must be seen and heard and hear and see. Managers, communicate with your team. Let each person know where they stand. Talk about their fears. Listen to them. Explain your plan of action. Tell them how you plan to win in the marketplace. If you always fill the VOID with positive energy then negativity and fear can't breed and grow.
5. Turn Negative Energy into Positive Solutions:
Utilize your current challenges, problems and complaints as a way to generate new ideas, innovations and paths to success. Study history and you'll find that many successful companies, products and initiatives were born during recessions and downturns. Encourage each person in your organization to ask and answer the following questions:
1. What can we learn from these challenges?
2. How can we improve because of it?
3. What opportunities does it present?
4. What actions do we need to take now?
These are uncertain times and no one can predict what the future will look like but by filling the voids with positive leadership, positive communication and positive action there is one thing you can be certain of - a future where you are stronger, wiser and better than you are today.
Stay Positive!
Jon Gordon
When there is a void of clear and positive communication people start to assume the worst and act accordingly. At the root, it's all about fear. When we are uncertain, fear and negativity creep in and dominate our thoughts, behavior and actions. This leads to a lack of trust, decreased productivity, poor focus, uninspired teamwork and sub-par performance. Instead of taking positive actions to thrive our teams go into survival mode and just try to survive.
That’s why I believe now, more than ever, is a time for positive leadership. Now is a time to stop obsessing about the recession, get back to basics, create a plan of action, and inspire, encourage and empower your teams. Why? Having worked with countless leaders over the years in businesses, schools and professional sports I’ve realized that great leadership is first and foremost a transfer of belief. So often the difference between success and failure is belief. Positive leaders share their belief, optimism, vision, purpose and plan with their organization and in the process they inspire and empower their teams to believe, act and execute. Positive beliefs lead to powerful plans and actions and this leads to significant results.
However, positive leadership requires more than inspirational speeches. It is a process and there are several steps you need to take to get your team on the bus and moving in the right direction.
1. Make Your Culture a Priority:
Negativity and fear are knocking your people off balance. It’s time to regroup, refocus, and unite them to create a winning culture and team environment. Remember, you win in the office first. Then you win in the marketplace. With a winning team you create strength on the inside that can withstand the negativity, naysayers and adversity on the outside.
I saw this happen first hand with Atlanta Falcons last season. In the face of the Michael Vick scandal, Coach Mike Smith took charge and built a winning team by making the team culture, attitude and synergy his priority. I was brought in to help with this process and we saw and immediate and powerful impact.
2. Share a Positive Vision:
It has to be clear, bold and simple so that that everyone in your organization can understand and rally around it. It also has to be relevant to the challenges you have faced and the direction you must go. As a leader you must share this vision every day with everyone in your organization and encourage your managers and employees to do the same. Invite everyone on the bus and energize them towards a common vision, goal and destination.
3. Develop a Fleet of Bus Drivers:
Once you share the vision and invite everyone on the same bus then it’s essential that each person in your organization understand how they can contribute to this vision. This empowers each person to drive their own bus and generates a fleet of bus drivers with your organization all moving in the same direction with a shared vision, focus and purpose.
4. Fill the VOID...Often:
Leaders, you must personally meet with your company and continually share your vision for the future and your fiscal status. Now is not a time to be in your office. Now you must be seen and heard and hear and see. Managers, communicate with your team. Let each person know where they stand. Talk about their fears. Listen to them. Explain your plan of action. Tell them how you plan to win in the marketplace. If you always fill the VOID with positive energy then negativity and fear can't breed and grow.
5. Turn Negative Energy into Positive Solutions:
Utilize your current challenges, problems and complaints as a way to generate new ideas, innovations and paths to success. Study history and you'll find that many successful companies, products and initiatives were born during recessions and downturns. Encourage each person in your organization to ask and answer the following questions:
1. What can we learn from these challenges?
2. How can we improve because of it?
3. What opportunities does it present?
4. What actions do we need to take now?
These are uncertain times and no one can predict what the future will look like but by filling the voids with positive leadership, positive communication and positive action there is one thing you can be certain of - a future where you are stronger, wiser and better than you are today.
Stay Positive!
Jon Gordon
Sunday, June 14, 2009
101 Tips for Pageant Success
1. Smile, smile, SMILE!
2. While on stage, hold your head high and pretend that crown’s already on your head.
3. Scan the judges, scan the audience, then once again scan the judges.
4. If you find it difficult to look the judges in the eyes, look at their foreheads.
5. Remember – it isn’t the most talented girl who wins the talent competition. It’s whoever has the best stage presence.
6. Don’t compare yourself to the other girls, because you’re only being judged on you.
7. You don’t need to spend thousands of dollars to get a pageant winning dress. Search ebay or your local mall for sales. If it is elegant, sparkles on stage, and it makes you feel like a queen, then it could be your winning gown.
8. Swimsuit isn’t about who is the hottest girl on the stage. It is about who has the most confidence walking out on a stage in what can feel like underwear.
9. If at first you don’t succeed, try again. Most pageant winners have competed before, often many times.
10. It is good to exercise and eat well before a pageant, but there is no need to starve yourself because no matter what your size, your confidence and poise is what will take you on to the next stage of competition.
11. DON’T LIE ON YOUR PAPERWORK OR IN THE INTERVIEW. If you get caught in a lie, or one of the judges is an excellent poker player, your bluff will cost you.
12. Be true to yourself. The judges want to see girls who are real, not girls who sound rehearsed.
13. On your fact sheet, don’t give it all away. Make statements somewhat vague so the judges have something to ask about!
14. Practice, practice, practice. The more you practice, the more prepared you are, the better you’ll do.
15. You don’t have to have perfect grades or have something super impressive on your fact sheet to impress the judges. What will make you stand out is something unique that not many people have done or can do. Play the accordion? Race go carts? Breed hamsters? Write it down.
16. Have someone proofread your paperwork before you turn it in.
17. Perform your talent for as many people as you can. The more advice you can get, the better your performance will be.
18. Choose a platform that really means something to you, not just something you think will impress the judges.
19. Know your current events and important issues that are being discussed in the news.
20. Even if you don’t get the crown, you’re a winner just for competing so if you don’t win, don’t feel like a loser.
21. If you want to begin to eat healthier before the pageant, do some reading on proper nutrition. Surviving on tiny salads and diet soda will only slow your metabolism and you won’t lose fat that way.
22. Diet pills do NOT work. Enough said.
23. Every girl has a little "junk in the trunk". If you jiggle, don’t worry about it. Even the skinniest girls have a little jiggle room back there.
24. Cover any and all tattoos and remove any piercings other than up to two holes in your ear. You aren’t supposed to be judged on such things but unfortunately some people will. Sure, those people are stupid but there’s nothing you can do about it.
25. You don’t need to hire some expensive pageant coach to win. Anyone can do the same job and with a little reading and some research you can learn all you need to know about pageants.
26. Read up on some famous titleholders, especially if you’re competing in the Miss America or Miss USA systems.
27. On stage question is not as tough as it might seem. Often times the stage lights are so bright you can’t see the audience anyway so just pretend they aren’t even there.
28. If you don’t feel confident on stage, try and get some friends and family to be your "cheering section". This will definitely give you a confidence boost while on stage!!
29. In order to create a natural smile rather than a "plastic look", think of something funny before you go on stage. I kept a picture of David Hasselhoff from his Baywatch days backstage. This struck me as funny and kept my smile from looking unnatural.
30. The interview isn’t an interrogation, but rather a conversation where the judges can get to know you better.
31. Know your platform inside and out. You never know what you’ll be asked.
32. Be sure you understand just what the responsibilities of the titleholder are. You don’t want to win and discover that you can’t handle the job.
33. Don’t be afraid to ask questions in the interview if you don’t understand. The judges will be glad to clarify for you.
34. Try and think of all of your positive traits first before you write your paperwork. It’ll help a lot!
35. Never portray yourself in a negative light in any part of the competition. You want to be confident, not self-depreciating.
36. Does this pageant charge you to compete? Then forget about it. It’s only a scam.
37. Make sure your talent is not too long. If you have to change it the day before competition you might not perform very well.
38. Form opinions on EVERYTHING, from your opinion on the death penalty to what your favorite color is.
39. Use the bathroom before the interview and before the show. Trust me, you’ll appreciate it.
40. Keep your clothes organized and hung up so you can find things and they remain unwrinkled. When you have to change fast you won’t be stressing out about where you put your strapless bra or that your suit is wrinkled.
41. Don’t drink any carbonated drinks on competition day to prevent bloating.
42. Always maintain excellent posture. Shoulders back, chin parallel to the ground, and back straight, whether you’re sitting or standing.
43. Keep your walk slow and elegant during evening gown. Remember, it’s at this point the judges will be able to see who that crown will fit on best.
44. Search online for a good "pageant hairstyle". Look at pictures of all the current Miss America or Miss USA contestants for ideas. NO PROM UPDOS!! They just don’t work.
45. Don’t fuss with tons of jewelry. A large pair of rhinestone earrings can be all you’ll need. Search stores like Icing or Claire’s for cheaper accessories because when they have sales they mark some gorgeous jewelry down for dirt cheap.
46. Make sure your gown fits perfectly. This sometimes means waiting until a month or two before competition to buy it because if you lose or gain weight in the meantime, it may not fit right and you don’t want to find that out two weeks beforehand.
47. You don’t need to spend hundreds of dollars for a "pageant swimsuit", either. Stick with solid colors that compliment your skin tone and hair color. Something that has a touch of sparkle to it will look great.
48. Your evening gown shouldn’t look too much like your typical high school prom dress. Look at the type of dresses Miss America contestants wear. They are elegant, often with long trains, and they have at least a touch of sparkle. You can find these gowns among the many prom-type gowns but it can take a lot of searching to find the perfect one.
49. Do your research. There are lots of good pageant resources online, but finding them can be tough. Google will be your friend.
50. Talk to the current titleholder about what she does to prepare for competition. She’s already done it so she’s bound to have some excellent pointers for you.
51. Don’t do a pageant just because someone else wants you to. You won’t win and you won’t be happy. You have to want it.
52. Want a pretty crown? Buy one on ebay. Being a titleholder can often be a big responsibility, so be prepared.
53. Don’t spend thousands on cosmetic dentistry. Get some Crest Whitestrips if that will make your smile more confident. If you’re worried about the appearance of your teeth, see an orthodontist. Braces aren’t all that bad and you’ll be happy you had them because your mouth will be prettier and healthier.
54. Show your personality both in the interview and on the stage.
55. Get plenty of beauty sleep during pageant week!
56. Never get yourself down because you think the other girls are "better" or "prettier". We’re all more critical of ourselves.
57. You don’t to sing or play an instrument to win. Dancers and monologues do quite well, also. A unique talent will really set you apart, too. Are you a baton twirler? Juggler? Yodeler? Give it a shot because you’re bound to stand out among all the boring song and dance routines.
58. Afraid to go to the beach in your swimsuit? Probably not. So why is the stage any different? Those heels are just like sandals and at least on stage you can wear some sort of body makeup, boob pads, and butt glue. That stuff won’t fly down in Daytona and I bet you wouldn’t let that stop you from having fun there, either.
59. Make friends with the other girls! Don’t be catty or talk behind backs. Miss Congeniality is an even more honorable title than Miss America.
60. Don’t stay out late the night before the pageant. Dark circles under your eyes can only be covered up to a certain extent.
61. If and when you win, you are representing a group of people. Be a good representative and don’t do anything you might regret later or that might force the pageant to strip you of your title.
62. 99.9% of your interview will probably be based on your fact sheet. Just FYI.
63. Even though most of your interview will be based on your fact sheet, still be aware of your current events just incase they pop one of those questions on you. Don’t know what’s going on in the world most of the time? Then fill up that fact sheet so they’ve got more things to ask you.
64. Keep your answers short and concise. If you’re asked, "Do you take criticism well?" don’t answer with a one minute speech about the time when you were criticized and it made you feel bad. No one word answers, though. The more questions the judges can ask you, the more they get to know you, and the better you’ll do.
65. A little extra padding can go a long way. I think that statement’s self explanatory.
66. Make sure you have extra nylons. You never know when you’ll get the runs.
67. Don’t be afraid to make the judges laugh a little! Sharing something humorous will lighten the mood and make them feel more comfortable.
68. The judges are often just as nervous as you are, or even more so. They have a huge decision to make that could change the lives of the girls competing.
69. Still feeling nervous? Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Deep breathing relaxes the body. Another thing you might try is listening to a favorite song or watching an episode of your favorite comedy on your ipod beforehand.
70. Only tell a story if it is relevant and doesn’t take too long to tell. Remember, you’ve only got a matter of minutes for these judges to get to know you.
71. Read books that are geared towards people looking to improve your job interview skills. A pageant is just like a job interview. You are being interviewed for the job of Miss Whoever.
72. Have your friends and family pop interview questions on you. The more practice, the better.
73. Is there a local title you really want to win but don’t have much experience? Try entering an open pageant (one in which anyone in the state can enter). The competition will be MUCH tougher and it will give you some valuable experience. The girls competing may be quite experienced and can give you plenty of advice.
74. Watch pageants on TV. See just how these girls do it.
75. Still don’t feel like a queen? Buy a plastic crown and wear it while you practice that evening gown walk. It may seem silly, but it can be a confidence booster!
76. You don’t need to be 5’9", blonde, and have a white gown to win. You can win no matter what your size, shape, color, or social status. The judges don’t know how much money you have or if that’s really your natural hair color or not.
77. Make sure you have tons of fun! If you aren’t having fun, maybe this pageant thing isn’t for you. It shouldn’t seem like a chore. You should enjoy it.
78. While working on your platform, make sure you know the names of organizations that are somehow connected that you can get into contact with. If you’ve got such connections it’ll be very impressive to the judges.
79. Search Yahoo or any news site for current events relating to your platform. If your platform’s cancer and someone very famous died of cancer last week, you might want to know this. If your platform is AIDS and they’ve discovered a new treatment a couple days ago and if you can include that in the interview, it’ll wow them.
80. The competition is a performance! Put on a good show. You want to entertain as well as impress.
81. You should use some sunless tanner to get some color in your skin if you’re very pale. The color accentuates your muscle tone and makes you appear to be thinner.
82. If you’re still feeling self conscious about something "jiggling", rub Preparation H on it. It tightens the skin temporarily so use it before you go on for swimsuit.
83. Use a shimmer lotion on the front of your legs and your arms for a slimming effect.
84. If you want to know how you’re doing, ask the pageant directors. Hopefully they’ll be honest with you.
85. I know it’s ridiculous, but… "BE THE CROWN!! You ARE the crown!!"
86. Wear heels everywhere. It’ll help your walk immensely.
87. Pump iron. Weight training along with cardio will keep you toned and burn more fat. If you’re in good shape you’ll be more confident!!
88. Remember that oftentimes the judges are at foot level. Have a nice, neat pedicure. Use a light pink polish if you are unsure as to what color to use. It looks classy and goes with everything.
89. Keep double stick tape and super glue in your dressing room. You never know when it’ll come in handy.
90. Your talent costume should be comfortable but also a little flashy. In the pageant world, a little sparkle here and there (or a lot of sparkle, whichever you like best) goes a long way.
91. Pageants are a great way to earn scholarships. Look for pageants that reward scholarships for all contestants participating so you’re guaranteed to get something back out of it.
92. Fake eyelashes are great for the stage, but don’t wear them in the interview. The interview is a much more professional setting so wear a nice suit, small earrings, and little makeup. Your makeup should be just as much as you might wear on an average day.
93. Whether you’re an A cup or a DD cup, you don’t need plastic surgery to win a pageant. Don’t be like those girls on MTV’s Tiara Girls who think they need lip injections to do well. Have you noticed that those girls usually don’t win?
94. Don’t scoff at first runner up. First runner up means you beat out everyone else except one, and that’s nothing to cry about!
95. You never know what’s going to happen. Don’t prepare to win or to lose. This set of judges might make one decision and another set of judges could make an entirely different decision!! A girl who was fourth runner up at a local pageant was awarded the crown when the winner was stripped of her title for some reason and the three girls ahead of her were ineligible because they’d already won other titles. This girl recently became Miss Kentucky.
96. If you make a mistake, try to act like it never happened. The audience may not notice and if the judges notice but see how quickly you can pick up your composure quickly afterwards they might be impressed.
97. Be on time. There is no such thing as fashionably late in the pageant world.
98. Not everyone is as nice as they appear. Be nice to everyone during the pageant and if someone turns on you don’t seek revenge. No matter what, always strive to be Miss Congeniality. It will take you far not only in pageants but also in life.
99. Be prepared for everything. I suggest bringing a large Rubbermaid container and pack everything but the kitchen sink because you never know what you might need backstage.
100. Don’t change anything during pageant week. Make all of your final wardrobe decisions beforehand and you’ll feel prepared and confident!
101. Last, but most certainly not least…HAVE FUN!
2. While on stage, hold your head high and pretend that crown’s already on your head.
3. Scan the judges, scan the audience, then once again scan the judges.
4. If you find it difficult to look the judges in the eyes, look at their foreheads.
5. Remember – it isn’t the most talented girl who wins the talent competition. It’s whoever has the best stage presence.
6. Don’t compare yourself to the other girls, because you’re only being judged on you.
7. You don’t need to spend thousands of dollars to get a pageant winning dress. Search ebay or your local mall for sales. If it is elegant, sparkles on stage, and it makes you feel like a queen, then it could be your winning gown.
8. Swimsuit isn’t about who is the hottest girl on the stage. It is about who has the most confidence walking out on a stage in what can feel like underwear.
9. If at first you don’t succeed, try again. Most pageant winners have competed before, often many times.
10. It is good to exercise and eat well before a pageant, but there is no need to starve yourself because no matter what your size, your confidence and poise is what will take you on to the next stage of competition.
11. DON’T LIE ON YOUR PAPERWORK OR IN THE INTERVIEW. If you get caught in a lie, or one of the judges is an excellent poker player, your bluff will cost you.
12. Be true to yourself. The judges want to see girls who are real, not girls who sound rehearsed.
13. On your fact sheet, don’t give it all away. Make statements somewhat vague so the judges have something to ask about!
14. Practice, practice, practice. The more you practice, the more prepared you are, the better you’ll do.
15. You don’t have to have perfect grades or have something super impressive on your fact sheet to impress the judges. What will make you stand out is something unique that not many people have done or can do. Play the accordion? Race go carts? Breed hamsters? Write it down.
16. Have someone proofread your paperwork before you turn it in.
17. Perform your talent for as many people as you can. The more advice you can get, the better your performance will be.
18. Choose a platform that really means something to you, not just something you think will impress the judges.
19. Know your current events and important issues that are being discussed in the news.
20. Even if you don’t get the crown, you’re a winner just for competing so if you don’t win, don’t feel like a loser.
21. If you want to begin to eat healthier before the pageant, do some reading on proper nutrition. Surviving on tiny salads and diet soda will only slow your metabolism and you won’t lose fat that way.
22. Diet pills do NOT work. Enough said.
23. Every girl has a little "junk in the trunk". If you jiggle, don’t worry about it. Even the skinniest girls have a little jiggle room back there.
24. Cover any and all tattoos and remove any piercings other than up to two holes in your ear. You aren’t supposed to be judged on such things but unfortunately some people will. Sure, those people are stupid but there’s nothing you can do about it.
25. You don’t need to hire some expensive pageant coach to win. Anyone can do the same job and with a little reading and some research you can learn all you need to know about pageants.
26. Read up on some famous titleholders, especially if you’re competing in the Miss America or Miss USA systems.
27. On stage question is not as tough as it might seem. Often times the stage lights are so bright you can’t see the audience anyway so just pretend they aren’t even there.
28. If you don’t feel confident on stage, try and get some friends and family to be your "cheering section". This will definitely give you a confidence boost while on stage!!
29. In order to create a natural smile rather than a "plastic look", think of something funny before you go on stage. I kept a picture of David Hasselhoff from his Baywatch days backstage. This struck me as funny and kept my smile from looking unnatural.
30. The interview isn’t an interrogation, but rather a conversation where the judges can get to know you better.
31. Know your platform inside and out. You never know what you’ll be asked.
32. Be sure you understand just what the responsibilities of the titleholder are. You don’t want to win and discover that you can’t handle the job.
33. Don’t be afraid to ask questions in the interview if you don’t understand. The judges will be glad to clarify for you.
34. Try and think of all of your positive traits first before you write your paperwork. It’ll help a lot!
35. Never portray yourself in a negative light in any part of the competition. You want to be confident, not self-depreciating.
36. Does this pageant charge you to compete? Then forget about it. It’s only a scam.
37. Make sure your talent is not too long. If you have to change it the day before competition you might not perform very well.
38. Form opinions on EVERYTHING, from your opinion on the death penalty to what your favorite color is.
39. Use the bathroom before the interview and before the show. Trust me, you’ll appreciate it.
40. Keep your clothes organized and hung up so you can find things and they remain unwrinkled. When you have to change fast you won’t be stressing out about where you put your strapless bra or that your suit is wrinkled.
41. Don’t drink any carbonated drinks on competition day to prevent bloating.
42. Always maintain excellent posture. Shoulders back, chin parallel to the ground, and back straight, whether you’re sitting or standing.
43. Keep your walk slow and elegant during evening gown. Remember, it’s at this point the judges will be able to see who that crown will fit on best.
44. Search online for a good "pageant hairstyle". Look at pictures of all the current Miss America or Miss USA contestants for ideas. NO PROM UPDOS!! They just don’t work.
45. Don’t fuss with tons of jewelry. A large pair of rhinestone earrings can be all you’ll need. Search stores like Icing or Claire’s for cheaper accessories because when they have sales they mark some gorgeous jewelry down for dirt cheap.
46. Make sure your gown fits perfectly. This sometimes means waiting until a month or two before competition to buy it because if you lose or gain weight in the meantime, it may not fit right and you don’t want to find that out two weeks beforehand.
47. You don’t need to spend hundreds of dollars for a "pageant swimsuit", either. Stick with solid colors that compliment your skin tone and hair color. Something that has a touch of sparkle to it will look great.
48. Your evening gown shouldn’t look too much like your typical high school prom dress. Look at the type of dresses Miss America contestants wear. They are elegant, often with long trains, and they have at least a touch of sparkle. You can find these gowns among the many prom-type gowns but it can take a lot of searching to find the perfect one.
49. Do your research. There are lots of good pageant resources online, but finding them can be tough. Google will be your friend.
50. Talk to the current titleholder about what she does to prepare for competition. She’s already done it so she’s bound to have some excellent pointers for you.
51. Don’t do a pageant just because someone else wants you to. You won’t win and you won’t be happy. You have to want it.
52. Want a pretty crown? Buy one on ebay. Being a titleholder can often be a big responsibility, so be prepared.
53. Don’t spend thousands on cosmetic dentistry. Get some Crest Whitestrips if that will make your smile more confident. If you’re worried about the appearance of your teeth, see an orthodontist. Braces aren’t all that bad and you’ll be happy you had them because your mouth will be prettier and healthier.
54. Show your personality both in the interview and on the stage.
55. Get plenty of beauty sleep during pageant week!
56. Never get yourself down because you think the other girls are "better" or "prettier". We’re all more critical of ourselves.
57. You don’t to sing or play an instrument to win. Dancers and monologues do quite well, also. A unique talent will really set you apart, too. Are you a baton twirler? Juggler? Yodeler? Give it a shot because you’re bound to stand out among all the boring song and dance routines.
58. Afraid to go to the beach in your swimsuit? Probably not. So why is the stage any different? Those heels are just like sandals and at least on stage you can wear some sort of body makeup, boob pads, and butt glue. That stuff won’t fly down in Daytona and I bet you wouldn’t let that stop you from having fun there, either.
59. Make friends with the other girls! Don’t be catty or talk behind backs. Miss Congeniality is an even more honorable title than Miss America.
60. Don’t stay out late the night before the pageant. Dark circles under your eyes can only be covered up to a certain extent.
61. If and when you win, you are representing a group of people. Be a good representative and don’t do anything you might regret later or that might force the pageant to strip you of your title.
62. 99.9% of your interview will probably be based on your fact sheet. Just FYI.
63. Even though most of your interview will be based on your fact sheet, still be aware of your current events just incase they pop one of those questions on you. Don’t know what’s going on in the world most of the time? Then fill up that fact sheet so they’ve got more things to ask you.
64. Keep your answers short and concise. If you’re asked, "Do you take criticism well?" don’t answer with a one minute speech about the time when you were criticized and it made you feel bad. No one word answers, though. The more questions the judges can ask you, the more they get to know you, and the better you’ll do.
65. A little extra padding can go a long way. I think that statement’s self explanatory.
66. Make sure you have extra nylons. You never know when you’ll get the runs.
67. Don’t be afraid to make the judges laugh a little! Sharing something humorous will lighten the mood and make them feel more comfortable.
68. The judges are often just as nervous as you are, or even more so. They have a huge decision to make that could change the lives of the girls competing.
69. Still feeling nervous? Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Deep breathing relaxes the body. Another thing you might try is listening to a favorite song or watching an episode of your favorite comedy on your ipod beforehand.
70. Only tell a story if it is relevant and doesn’t take too long to tell. Remember, you’ve only got a matter of minutes for these judges to get to know you.
71. Read books that are geared towards people looking to improve your job interview skills. A pageant is just like a job interview. You are being interviewed for the job of Miss Whoever.
72. Have your friends and family pop interview questions on you. The more practice, the better.
73. Is there a local title you really want to win but don’t have much experience? Try entering an open pageant (one in which anyone in the state can enter). The competition will be MUCH tougher and it will give you some valuable experience. The girls competing may be quite experienced and can give you plenty of advice.
74. Watch pageants on TV. See just how these girls do it.
75. Still don’t feel like a queen? Buy a plastic crown and wear it while you practice that evening gown walk. It may seem silly, but it can be a confidence booster!
76. You don’t need to be 5’9", blonde, and have a white gown to win. You can win no matter what your size, shape, color, or social status. The judges don’t know how much money you have or if that’s really your natural hair color or not.
77. Make sure you have tons of fun! If you aren’t having fun, maybe this pageant thing isn’t for you. It shouldn’t seem like a chore. You should enjoy it.
78. While working on your platform, make sure you know the names of organizations that are somehow connected that you can get into contact with. If you’ve got such connections it’ll be very impressive to the judges.
79. Search Yahoo or any news site for current events relating to your platform. If your platform’s cancer and someone very famous died of cancer last week, you might want to know this. If your platform is AIDS and they’ve discovered a new treatment a couple days ago and if you can include that in the interview, it’ll wow them.
80. The competition is a performance! Put on a good show. You want to entertain as well as impress.
81. You should use some sunless tanner to get some color in your skin if you’re very pale. The color accentuates your muscle tone and makes you appear to be thinner.
82. If you’re still feeling self conscious about something "jiggling", rub Preparation H on it. It tightens the skin temporarily so use it before you go on for swimsuit.
83. Use a shimmer lotion on the front of your legs and your arms for a slimming effect.
84. If you want to know how you’re doing, ask the pageant directors. Hopefully they’ll be honest with you.
85. I know it’s ridiculous, but… "BE THE CROWN!! You ARE the crown!!"
86. Wear heels everywhere. It’ll help your walk immensely.
87. Pump iron. Weight training along with cardio will keep you toned and burn more fat. If you’re in good shape you’ll be more confident!!
88. Remember that oftentimes the judges are at foot level. Have a nice, neat pedicure. Use a light pink polish if you are unsure as to what color to use. It looks classy and goes with everything.
89. Keep double stick tape and super glue in your dressing room. You never know when it’ll come in handy.
90. Your talent costume should be comfortable but also a little flashy. In the pageant world, a little sparkle here and there (or a lot of sparkle, whichever you like best) goes a long way.
91. Pageants are a great way to earn scholarships. Look for pageants that reward scholarships for all contestants participating so you’re guaranteed to get something back out of it.
92. Fake eyelashes are great for the stage, but don’t wear them in the interview. The interview is a much more professional setting so wear a nice suit, small earrings, and little makeup. Your makeup should be just as much as you might wear on an average day.
93. Whether you’re an A cup or a DD cup, you don’t need plastic surgery to win a pageant. Don’t be like those girls on MTV’s Tiara Girls who think they need lip injections to do well. Have you noticed that those girls usually don’t win?
94. Don’t scoff at first runner up. First runner up means you beat out everyone else except one, and that’s nothing to cry about!
95. You never know what’s going to happen. Don’t prepare to win or to lose. This set of judges might make one decision and another set of judges could make an entirely different decision!! A girl who was fourth runner up at a local pageant was awarded the crown when the winner was stripped of her title for some reason and the three girls ahead of her were ineligible because they’d already won other titles. This girl recently became Miss Kentucky.
96. If you make a mistake, try to act like it never happened. The audience may not notice and if the judges notice but see how quickly you can pick up your composure quickly afterwards they might be impressed.
97. Be on time. There is no such thing as fashionably late in the pageant world.
98. Not everyone is as nice as they appear. Be nice to everyone during the pageant and if someone turns on you don’t seek revenge. No matter what, always strive to be Miss Congeniality. It will take you far not only in pageants but also in life.
99. Be prepared for everything. I suggest bringing a large Rubbermaid container and pack everything but the kitchen sink because you never know what you might need backstage.
100. Don’t change anything during pageant week. Make all of your final wardrobe decisions beforehand and you’ll feel prepared and confident!
101. Last, but most certainly not least…HAVE FUN!
Friday, June 12, 2009
10 principles for Peace of MIND
1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked:
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others' affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget:
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forgive,20Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition:
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.
4. Do Not Be Jealous:
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.
5. Change Yourself According To The Environment:
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.
6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured:
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control... If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew:
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.
8. Meditate Regularly:
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.
9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant:
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name.
10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret:
Do not waste time in protracted wondering " Should I or shouldn't I?" Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spilt milk?
Think Positive
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others' affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget:
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forgive,20Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition:
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.
4. Do Not Be Jealous:
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.
5. Change Yourself According To The Environment:
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.
6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured:
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control... If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew:
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.
8. Meditate Regularly:
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.
9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant:
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name.
10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret:
Do not waste time in protracted wondering " Should I or shouldn't I?" Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spilt milk?
Think Positive
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Gifts You Should NEVER Give to Your Boss or Co-Workers
There are no formal business etiquette "rules" that require anyone to give a gift to a co-worker or boss, but many people do exchange gifts at work. It is important to remember that giving the wrong gift can convey a message that is too personal, romantic, or even offensive. You also run the risk of making the recipient feel uncomfortable if they do not offer you a gift in return, or alienating co-workers if your gift is showy.
Deciding on the right gift to give can be difficult, but the following gifts are never right:
1. "Adult" Items:
Items that could be considered sexual in nature are inappropriate (and may even be illegal) in the workplace. Anything “adult” in nature should never be given in the workplace setting – even to the closest of co-workers. This not only includes the obvious like pornography and adult “toys,” but also includes artwork, books, and any image or rendering that depicts nudity or that may suggest a sexual act.
2. Gifts That Carry a Discriminating or Demeaning Message:
Never give gifts that could be considered offensive to women, minorities, or any race, culture, groups, or individual with disabilities – even if presented in the “spirit of fun.” This includes cards, gifts, artwork, caricatures, publications, and any other item that could be interpreted as stereotyping or discriminatory.
3. Politically-Oriented & Religious Gifts:
Unless someone has specifically asked for a particular political or religious item, book, or gift, do not try to guess on one. If you do honor a specific request, keep in mind that the item could still offend someone else in the office and give it wrapped and in private.
4. Personal Care Products:
Grooming items & sundries are generally too personal to give, especially when given to a member of the opposite sex. This includes body & skin care products, perfumes, toothbrushes, hairbrushes, & shaving sundries. That scented hand lotion you love might seem like a good idea but when given to a person with allergies or asthma you are giving a gift that cannot be used.
5. Intimate Clothing:
All under garments, and in most cases, any articles of clothing except for hats, scarves, or gloves are not good gifts to give co-workers or your boss. A corporate T-shirt is acceptable, but may seem a bit on the “cheap” side.
6. Romantic Jewelry:
If you give jewelry, stick to small, casual items and give them only to members of the same sex unless the gift is being given by a group.
The key to remember when giving jewelry is that some items may be interpreted as a romantic gesture, especially if the jewelry is expensive. The best jewelry items to give are inexpensive or moderately priced watches (including pocket watches) or simple, trendy bracelets or pins. Pearls, diamonds and gemstones are generally not a good idea if the gift is intended as a casual gesture.
7. Flowers:
Do not give roses. It is better to give poinsettias, "lucky" bamboo, or other plants instead of flowers. They last longer & cannot be interpreted as a romantic gesture. Casual flowers like daisies, wildflowers, or bulbs the turn into blooms are also fine. (Hint: No one really likes a chia pet.)
8. Cash:
Never give your boss or a co-worker cash (but gift cards are acceptable). Cash should only be given by the company or employer when it is given as a taxable bonus, not as a personal gift.
Business Gifts Etiquette Tips:
Giving no gift at all can be better than giving the wrong gift. A good rule of thumb is to ask yourself if the gift is something you would let a child see (even if they would not enjoy the gift itself). If you would not let a child see the gift, it may not be appropriate to give to someone at work.
Deciding on the right gift to give can be difficult, but the following gifts are never right:
1. "Adult" Items:
Items that could be considered sexual in nature are inappropriate (and may even be illegal) in the workplace. Anything “adult” in nature should never be given in the workplace setting – even to the closest of co-workers. This not only includes the obvious like pornography and adult “toys,” but also includes artwork, books, and any image or rendering that depicts nudity or that may suggest a sexual act.
2. Gifts That Carry a Discriminating or Demeaning Message:
Never give gifts that could be considered offensive to women, minorities, or any race, culture, groups, or individual with disabilities – even if presented in the “spirit of fun.” This includes cards, gifts, artwork, caricatures, publications, and any other item that could be interpreted as stereotyping or discriminatory.
3. Politically-Oriented & Religious Gifts:
Unless someone has specifically asked for a particular political or religious item, book, or gift, do not try to guess on one. If you do honor a specific request, keep in mind that the item could still offend someone else in the office and give it wrapped and in private.
4. Personal Care Products:
Grooming items & sundries are generally too personal to give, especially when given to a member of the opposite sex. This includes body & skin care products, perfumes, toothbrushes, hairbrushes, & shaving sundries. That scented hand lotion you love might seem like a good idea but when given to a person with allergies or asthma you are giving a gift that cannot be used.
5. Intimate Clothing:
All under garments, and in most cases, any articles of clothing except for hats, scarves, or gloves are not good gifts to give co-workers or your boss. A corporate T-shirt is acceptable, but may seem a bit on the “cheap” side.
6. Romantic Jewelry:
If you give jewelry, stick to small, casual items and give them only to members of the same sex unless the gift is being given by a group.
The key to remember when giving jewelry is that some items may be interpreted as a romantic gesture, especially if the jewelry is expensive. The best jewelry items to give are inexpensive or moderately priced watches (including pocket watches) or simple, trendy bracelets or pins. Pearls, diamonds and gemstones are generally not a good idea if the gift is intended as a casual gesture.
7. Flowers:
Do not give roses. It is better to give poinsettias, "lucky" bamboo, or other plants instead of flowers. They last longer & cannot be interpreted as a romantic gesture. Casual flowers like daisies, wildflowers, or bulbs the turn into blooms are also fine. (Hint: No one really likes a chia pet.)
8. Cash:
Never give your boss or a co-worker cash (but gift cards are acceptable). Cash should only be given by the company or employer when it is given as a taxable bonus, not as a personal gift.
Business Gifts Etiquette Tips:
Giving no gift at all can be better than giving the wrong gift. A good rule of thumb is to ask yourself if the gift is something you would let a child see (even if they would not enjoy the gift itself). If you would not let a child see the gift, it may not be appropriate to give to someone at work.
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