Lesson 6: Quit smoking (as often as you need to)

For all of Obama's physical credentials, he's carried around the ultimate health taboo, smoking, for most of his adult life. And he inhaled, all right. Then word came that he'd quit smoking.

"There wasn't some dramatic moment," he says. "Michelle had been putting pressure on me for a while. I was never really a heavy smoker. Probably at my peak I was smoking 7 or 8 a day. More typical was 3. So it wasn't a huge challenge with huge withdrawal symptoms. There have been a couple of times during the campaign when I fell off the wagon and bummed one, and I had to kick it again. But I figure, seeing as I'm running for President, I need to cut myself a little slack."

He does have advice for people, like him, who are wrestling with the dependency. "Eliminate certain key connections -- that first cigarette in the morning, or after a meal, or with a drink. If you can eliminate those triggers, that should help."

Lesson 5: The government isn't your nursemaid

The organization theme comes up again when I raise a pet peeve of this magazine: That the U.S. Government maintains at least 7 offices devoted to woman's health, but no office of men's health. This despite the fact that men die earlier than women due of heart disease, stroke, and cancer. I'm hoping to enlist him in the battle.

Nothing doing.

"I'm not sure we need an office," he says. "We need to have an awareness built in throughout various agencies charged with improving health. I'll give you a specific example. My Grandfather died of prostate cancer. As men age, regular checkups are critical. But it's hard to get them to go in for that mildly unpleasant checkup. Increasing awareness of the difference it could make shouldn't just be the activity of the Department of Health and Human Services."

And then he launches into a story involving a friend of his. It's a theme he returns to again and again as we talk: a world peopled with friends who taught him lessons, reminded him of what was important, reproached him in a useful way.

"A good friend of mine who was the head of the Illinois department of public health designed this wonderful program targeting black men, where health information was provided through barbershops. The idea was that a lot of black men under utilize doctors and don't talk about health much. But they go to the barbershop, and that's where they, kind of, let loose. The department designed programs where clinics at different barbershops would provide various health screenings, talk about prevention. Those kinds of strategies have to be developed and targeted, perhaps, because a lot of the time we're more resistant to going to doctors. That kind of thinking should be embedded in a lot of the work we're doing."

Lesson 4: Turn early lessons into big successes

Sarah Palin might not be too impressed with Obama's days as a community organizer, but he built that modest beginning -- putting together coalitions of voters across Chicago -- into the current grass-roots organization that's unlike anything our electoral process has ever seen. It's a classic example of applying a lesson learned on a small scale to the biggest challenge of a lifetime.

Clearly, he knows how to manage groups. By the time your outfit has its own plane, it'd better have a solid pilot.

"I'm part of an organization," he says, "and one of the things I really try to push in the organization is to make sure that everybody is focused on the two or three things that are really going to be game changers. I ask them to design my schedule in a way that focuses not just on what's coming at us, but on being active instead of reactive. I think we've been pretty successful. I don't spend a lot of time returning phone calls or Emails. If somebody needs something, most of the time there's somebody else who can handle it. Eliminating TV has been helpful." Wait, a confession: "I'm still a ****er for SportsCenter," he notes.

The goal of his organization, he says, is to clear time for job Number 1: "The most difficult thing is to carve out time to think, which is probably the most important time for somebody who's trying to shift an organization, or in this case, the country, as opposed to doing the same things that have been done before. And I find that time slips away."

Lesson 3: Make the future your focus

Another loss in the Obama family: the way a child's life changes in the glare of campaign lights. The Senator notes that his daughters were young, 5 and 8, when he had to explain the upheaval that was about to shake their family. He may as well have been talking about his plans to file income taxes. The kids cut to the really important stuff: "Their main concern was, 'When are we going to get a dog?' They did ask about what they called 'secret people,' which were the Secret Service folks. 'Are we going to have to have these people with sunglasses and earpieces following us around all the time?' And I told them, well, not right away. They've adjusted wonderfully. And I've tried to make sure that they haven't had to participate too much in the political process.

"The pledge is" -- he can't help making campaign promises, even to his kids -- "they'll get their dog, win or lose."

Lesson 2: Be there for your family, even if you're not around

We wondered if his wife, Michelle, and their two children, Malia and Sasha, might join him on the day's trip, to participate in the blow-out-the-candles moment. But Obama had boarded the plane with Secret Service and campaign staffers, not family members. So he himself is something of an absentee father on his big day.

"Yesterday was the birthday celebration," he tells. "We get everything in, just not always on schedule when it's supposed to happen. Yesterday I sat on a lounge chair in a friend's backyard, watching my girls and Michelle dance. It was as nice a moment as I've had in a long time."

"I don't miss the important things. I haven't missed a dance recital. I haven't missed a parent-teacher conference. But there are some things I do miss, and those are some of the tradeoffs you make."

"But, look, there's no question there are sacrifices involved here. I'd like to say that quality time replaces quantity, but sometimes it doesn't. You know, a lot of the best moments of family life happen spontaneously. If you have less time to devote to them, there are fewer of those moments. What I've been able to do is create a zone of normalcy for my kids. Michelle's been wonderful about that. I have been able to transmit to them my absolute interest in them and my absolute love for them."

Lesson 1: Learn from your father, even if he wasn't a good one

Barack Obama's life story, starting with his father's departure when he was 2-years-old, is the equivalent of a doctoral program in abandonment, dislocation, and healing. And the last of these can come about only when you truly come to terms with the first two. As Obama's memoir, Dreams from My Father, makes abundantly clear, he was one 20-something who took the time to understand exactly what it meant that his father left the family.

"I would like to think that most of the issues related to my father have been resolved," he says, pointedly. "That's part of what writing Dreams from My Father was about: understanding him, his own personal tragedy. He wasn't a presence in my life, he was an idea that I had to wrestle with for a long time."

Somebody once said, "Every man is either trying to live up to his dad's expectations or make up for his dad's mistakes. And I'm sure I was doing a little bit of both. But I feel that somewhere in my late 20s or early 30s I, sort of, figured out what his absence had meant. It is part of what I think has made me a pretty good dad. I don't think it would have too much of an impact on my decision-making as president. There's no doubt that it has contributed to my drive. I might not be here had it not been for that absent father prodding me early in life."

Building Up Your Self-esteem

If you feel that you are not “good enough”, or that you are undeserving of prosperity & friendship; if you feel that you “don’t belong” or are afraid of success, the odds are good that you have some problems with self-esteem.

Having low self-esteem takes an enormous toll on the quality of your life. You take fewer risks, which limits your opportunities, both personally & professionally. You are reluctant to voice or acknowledge your needs. You are probably also haunted by past mistakes & making future ones.

The good news is that self-esteem is self-taught (no one was born with low self-esteem), & the solution to raising your self-esteem lies within you. The tools you've used to (unconsciously) lower your self esteem are the same ones you use to raise it. Here are some hints to help you raise your self-esteem:

1. Stop comparing yourself to other people.
If you play this game, you're likely to compare yourself in a negative way & set yourself up for continuing to have low self esteem.Why continue to play a game where you've set the rules against yourself, so that you're less likely to win! You will never be as rich as Bill Gates or able to hit as many home runs as Barry Bonds. You can’t be them, but they cannot be you, either.

2. Don't keep putting yourself down!
You can't develop high self esteem if you constantly repeat negative comments about your skills and abilities. Other people will pick up on it and take on board the negative way you view yourself. How are they likely to treat you? Also don't beat yourself up over "mistakes" that you've made; learn how to re-frame them so that they work for you.

3. Accept all compliments graciously.
Don't dismiss or ignore them. Don’t look at your feet and say, “aw shucks, I really don’t deserve this praise”. You do deserve the praise; that is why you are receiving it. The proper response to any compliment is simple, say ‘Thank you” & mean it.

4. Mix with positive & supportive people.
Negative people can put you & your ideas down & it lowers your self esteem. On the other hand, when you are surrounded by supportive people, you feel better about yourself, which helps to raise your self-esteem. Learn how to develop your positive personal support network.

5. Acknowledge your positive qualities & skills.
Too many people with low self esteem constantly put themselves down (back to no 1 again!) & don't appreciate their many positive attributes. Learn how to truly affirm & value your many excellent qualities. If you find this difficult, ask others to tell you. They'll come up with things you would never have imagined!

6. Stop putting up with stuff!
Not voicing or acknowledging your needs means that you are probably tolerating more than you should. Find out what you're putting up with and zap those tolerations. By doing so, you're giving yourself the message that you're worth it.

7. Make positive contributions to others.
This doesn't mean that you constantly do for others what they could be doing for themselves. But when you do make a positive contribution to others, you begin to feel more valuable, which increases your sense of your own value & raises your self-esteem.

8. Involve yourself in work & activities that you love.
So many people with low self esteem stop doing those activities that they most enjoy. Even if you're not in a position to make immediate changes in your career, you can still devote some of your leisure time to enjoyable hobbies & activities.

Start taking action!
The universe rewards action.

Backing away & avoiding challenges means that your self esteem muscles become weak & flabby. When you start to take action regardless of the outcome you will start to feel better about yourself, develop your self confidence, & raise your self esteem.

11 Ways to Decompress after High Stress

These are some simple and great ways to destress after a tough day or event!

1. Deep Breathing. Take a deep breath. Hold it. Now let it out … slowly. Try counting to 10 as you let out your breath. Feel the tension and stress flowing out of you with your breath. Repeat 3-10 times, as necessary.

2. Self-massage. I like to massage my shoulders, neck, head, lower back. It helps a lot. Even better: get your honey to do it for you! Another great relaxation technique is to tense up and then relax each muscle in your body, one at a time, starting from your toes up to your head.

3. Take a walk. When I’m in the middle of stress, I like to take a walk around the building. I also do the deep breathing and self-massage mentioned above as I do so. It’s a great way of letting go of tension and allowing yourself to re-focus.

4. Exercise. This morning, I went to the beach at 5:30 a.m. and went for a swim. It was beautiful at the beach at around sunrise, and the swim was invigorating. Yesterday I went for a bike ride, and the morning before it was a short but refreshing run. Tomorrow I think I’ll do another short run. It really gets the stress out of your system and gives you some quiet time to think when you exercise.

5. Get outdoors. Even if I didn’t do the swim, just being there at the beach, with my decaf coffee was calming. It’s nice to connect with nature and take in the beauty around you. While you’re there, stretch, yawn, take some deep breaths, and enjoy.

6. Disconnect. Turn off the phones, turn off the computer, and shut off the outside world for a little while. These things just raise your stress level. Go offline and forget about the online world! You can do it! Except for Karmic Mantra. That’s the only blog you’re allowed to read when you decompress.

7. Take a day off. That’s what I’m doing today. Don’t tell my boss. I have lots of vacation and sick leave saved up, so it’s not a problem, actually. I’m just going to veg out and allow myself to calm down and center.

8. Meditate. You don’t need to be trained to have a short, relaxing meditation session. Just sit somewhere quiet, close your eyes, relax, and focus on your breathing. Try to concentrate on it coming into your body, and then going out. When other things pop into your head (they will, inevitably), just acknowledge them (don’t try to force them out) and allow them to leave, and then focus again on your breathing. Do this for as long as you can, and then take a couple of cleansing breaths, and get up a new person.

9. Read. I like to throw myself on the couch with a good book. Well, not necessarily a good book — a page-turner. Something that will engross me completely, take my mind off everything else. John Grisham works well for me, as does William Gibson. And Terry Pratchett. Or Ann Patchett, for that matter. And Stephen King. Just get lost in their world.

10. Love. I like to spend time with my kids or my wife. Just snuggle with them, focus on them, forget about the world. They are all that’s important, and sometimes I need that reminder.

11. Take a nap. One of my favorites. Just take a 30-minute nap, and you’re re-set! A nap is like a restart button for life.

How to Convince People Effectively

The ability make others believe what you believe is important for success in many fields. There is often a fine line between convincing somebody your views are valid and annoying them. In this article we’ll look at some of the techniques you can use if you want to convince another individual to believe what you believe.

Steps

* Do the homework. Make sure you understand your own viewpoint. If you are going to try to convince somebody that the Eiffel Tower is taller than the Statue of Liberty, find out the facts first, don’t make assumptions.

* Learn the field. For certain areas you will need to know more than just the facts, as some subjects are subjective. For example, if you wanted to convince somebody that the Statue of Liberty was prettier than the Eiffel Tower you will need to know enough about architecture and aesthetics to argue about that subject, as well as the facts, like how tall they are. If you are selling something, like a car, you will need to know all there is to know about the car you are selling. Likewise, you will need to know all about the other cars that are in competition with your vehicle.

* Engage the person politely. Maintain eye contact where possible, but don’t be annoying about it.

* Establish mutual respect. You will never convince anybody of anything if they believe you do not respect them, so show the person you respect them and be good enough to gain their respect.

* Gain trust. To convince people of most things you will need their trust. They don’t have to trust you as a person, but they do need to trust that what you are saying makes sense, that you know your “stuff”. The best way to do this is to do your homework and fieldwork, that way you know a lot about the subject.

* Listen carefully to what your debate partner has to say. Respond thoughtfully to their point of view.

* When you can, back up what you say with real facts. Lying will only convince somebody until they find out about the lie, then you will never be able to convince them of anything again.

* Be willing to be convinced. Sometimes accepting one point from the other person and showing that you can change your mind when you are wrong will help them to be the same, and change their mind about the subject you care about.

* Practice active listening. Active listening helps you control a conversation and keeps it on track. Active listening techniques include:
o Non-verbal feedback. Nodding your head as the other talks etc.
o Paraphrase what the other person has said to make sure you understand it.

* Make sure you understand the other person’s objections and respond to them in an intelligent manner.

* Keep vigilant about your belief, but always respectful of the beliefs of others. Explain why your belief is important to you.

* Understand the other person’s motivations. If you know what another person wants, you are more likely to be able to give it to them.

* Rephrase your beliefs in a way that the other person is better able to understand.

* Follow up. Ask questions to make sure the other person understands their new views completely.

Tips

* To hold the eye of a crowd select individuals in the crowd and hold their eyes on-and-off through your presentation.

* Never lose your cool. Nothing lacks conviction more than a raving idiot.

* Always be friendly and respectful even if the other person does not change their mind.

* Beliefs fade. You may think you have changed somebodies mind but find that in a day or two, perhaps a week, they are right back to where they were before.

* Buy and read some books on sales techniques.

Top 10 Productivity Hacks

Productivity Hacks We all need a productivity boost now and then — sometimes throughout the day. We each want to be productive for very personal reasons — to accomplish more, to make more money, to get done earlier to make more time for our personal lives, to accomplish our goals.

But whatever the reason, these Productivity Hacks will do the trick. Here they are, in reverse order.

#10: Take care of your Most Important Things first. Your Most Important Things for the day — the things you most need to accomplish that day - should take priority over everything else. However, we all know that fires come up throughout the day, interruptions through phone calls and email and people dropping by, new demands that will push the best-laid plans aside. If you put off your MITs until later in the day, you will end up not doing them much of the time.

# 9: Wake up early. Decide what you’d like to accomplish each morning, and build your morning routine around that. Like to exercise? Put that in there. Healthy breakfast? Go for it. Check email? Fine. The mornings are a fresh start, peaceful and free of ringing phones and constant email notifications. If you get your Most Important Things done in the morning, the rest of the day is just gravy.

# 8: Simplify information streams, crank through blogs & email. Think about all the information you receive (email, blogs, newsletters, mailing lists, magazines, newspapers and more) and edit brutally. You will drastically reduce the time you spend reading. For everything else that begins to come in after your editing process, ask yourself if you really need to be getting that information regularly. Most of the time the answer is no. Now, after this process, you should be left with less to read. Here’s the next step: crank through it all, really only reading the really interesting ones.

# 7: Declutter your workspace; work on one thing at a time. The decluttering your work space part of it is simply to remove all extra distractions, on your desk and on your computer. If you’ve got a clean, simplified workspace, you can better focus on the task at hand.

# 6: Get to work early; work fewer hours. My best days come when I get into work early, and begin my work day in the quiet morning hours, before the phones start ringing and the din of the office begins it crescendo to chaos. It is so peaceful, and I can work without interruption or losing focus. I often find that I get my MITs done before anyone comes in, and then the rest of the day is dealing with whatever comes up (or even better: getting ahead for the next day).

# 5: Avoid meetings; when you must meet, make it effective. I find it best to say no to meetings up front. I just say, “Sorry, I can’t make it. I’m tied up with a project right now.” And that’s always true. I’ve always got projects I’m working on that are more important than a meeting.

# 4: Avoid unnecessary work. If we just do any work that comes our way, we can be cranking out the tasks, but not be productive at all. You’re only productive if you are doing work that moves you towards a goal. Eliminate non-essential tasks from your to-do lists, and start to say no to new requests that are non-essential.

# 3: Do the tough tasks first. You know what those tasks are. What have you been putting off that you know you need to do? Sometimes when you put things off, they end up being things you don’t really need to do. But sometimes they are things you just gotta do. Those are your tough tasks.

# 2: Work off-line as much as possible. To increase your productivity, disconnect your Internet connection. Have scheduled times when you’re going to check your email, and only let yourself check your blogs or surf the web when you’ve gotten a certain amount done. When you do go online, do it on a timer. When the timer goes off, unplug again until the next scheduled time.

# 1: Do something you’re passionate about. This might not seem like the normal productivity tip, but give it a thought: if you really want to do something, you’ll work like hell to get it done. You’ll work extra hard, you’ll put in even more hours, and you’re less likely to procrastinate. It’s for work that you don’t really care about that you procrastinate. Read the full post for tips on how to find your dream job and do work you truly care about.

Type of Questions

Interviewers use five different types of questions - directive, non-directive, hypothetical, behavior descriptive, and stress. Being aware of the different types can help you in the preparation stage as you build your skills inventory. It may also help you focus in on exactly what is being asked and what the employer is looking for in specific questions.

Directive Questions
The interviewer determines the focus of your answer. The information that the interviewer wants is very clear. If you have completed the research on yourself, this type of question should be easy to answer.

Example: "What skills do you have that relate to this position?"

"I have very good communication and interpersonal skills that I have refined through several summer and part-time jobs working with the public. In addition, I am fluent in both English and French."

Non-Directive Questions
You determine the focus of your answer. The interviewer asks a general question and does not ask for specific information. The most common non-directive question is
"Tell me about yourself."

When answering the question, keep in mind that the employer is interested in knowing how your background and personality qualify you for the job. In your answer, you should cover four areas: your education, related experience, skills and abilities, and personal attributes. As you talk about these areas, relate them to the job you are seeking. Decide what your response will be before starting to speak, this helps to keep responses concise.

Example: " Tell me about yourself."

"I have a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Psychology, and have recently completed the course in Volunteer Management through the Volunteer Center of Winnipeg. These have given me a strong background in many of the principles of human behavior and the recruitment, training, and supervision of volunteers. I have experience in working with young adults in a helping capacity, both through my position as a Peer Advisor at the University of Manitoba, and as a camp counselor at a camp for behaviorally troubled adolescents. Both of these positions involved individual counseling, facilitating discussion groups, and teaching young people about health issues - all of which relate directly to the services which I would be training volunteers to provide within your organization. In addition, I thoroughly enjoy working with young people, and can establish rapport with them easily."

Hypothetical or Scenario Questions
When asking a hypothetical question, the interviewer describes a situation, which you may encounter in the position and asks how you would react in a similar situation. This is a good way to test problem-solving abilities. When answering this type of question, try applying a simple problem solving model to it – gather information, evaluate the information, priories the information, seek advice, weigh the alternatives, make a decision, communicate the decision, monitor the results and modify if necessary.

Example: "Suppose you are working your first day in our laboratory, and a fire at a nearby work station breaks out. What would you do?"

"Before I start working in any laboratory, I always locate the emergency equipment, such as eye washes, fire blankets and alarms. I would also review the safety protocols. So in this situation, I would be aware of these. As soon as I noticed the fire, I would shut down my experiment and if the fire is significant, I would pull the firm alarm and help to evacuate the lab. In the case of very small flame, I would ask the staff member at the station what I could do to help, Which would vary with the type of substances involved.”

Behavior Descriptive or Behavioral Questions
This type of question is becoming increasingly popular in interview situations. It asks what you did in a particular situation rather than what you would do. Situations chosen usually follow the job description fairly closely. Some employers feel that examples of past performance will help them to predict future performance in similar situations. There is no right or wrong answer to this type of question, but keep in mind that you should relate the answer to the position. If you are interviewing for a research position, talk about a research project you completed.

Example: "Give me an example of a work situation in which you were proud of your performance."

"While working as a sales representative for XYZ Company for the summer, I called on Prospective clients and persuaded them of the ecological and economic benefits of Recycling. I also followed up on clients to ensure that they were satisfied with the service They received. This involved both telephone and in-person contacts. I increased sales 34% over the same period in the previous year."
When preparing for this type of questioning, it is crucial that you review the skills and qualities that the position would require and identify specific examples from your past which demonstrated those traits.

Stress Questions
Some questions will surprise you and possibly make you feel uncomfortable during an interview.

For Example:" Which do you prefer, fruits or vegetables?"

There are many reasons why an interviewer might ask such questions. They may want to see how you react in difficult situations, or they may simply be trying to test your sense of humor. Such questions may directly challenge an opinion that you have just stated or say something negative about you or a reference. Sometimes they ask seemingly irrelevant questions such as, "If you were an animal, what type of animal would you be?"

The best way to deal with this type of question is to recognize what is happening. The interviewer is trying to elicit a reaction from you. Stay calm, and do not become defensive. If humour comes naturally to you, you might try using it in your response, but it is important to respond to the question. What you say is not nearly as important as maintaining your composure.

Example: "Which do you like better, Lions or Tigers?"

"Oh, lions definitely. They appear so majestic and are very sociable. To be honest, I think that seeing The Lion King four times has probably contributed to this!"

Move with the flow - learn to let go

We tend to cling to every object in our lives. We hold on to our profession, relationship or possession as if our entire world depends on them. We are so busy clinging to our own lives, that we have forgotten to live with the flow. We are afraid to move ahead, afraid to let go.

Life in essence is like an unobstructed, unrestrained, uncontrolled flow of a river. Life flows at its own pace and the ultimate source of all our pain and sufferings is our tendency to cling to and obstruct the flow. Professional life stagnates, relationships are broken, possessions are lost; all because we refused to let go when we were actually required to let things take their own course.

Why do we cling? We cling because change scares us; we cling because we are afraid to face the unknown, to face challenges; we cling because we feel secure if the status quo is maintained; we cling because we refuse to believe that life can never be static; because we refuse to accept the transience of everything; we believe that everything is in our hands. We do not have enough faith in life and that higher force which is omnipotent and omnipresent. In the chaos of existence, we have lost touch with our higher self. Most of us lead a life which is similar to that of a child who is lost in a crowd, separated from his guardians. He has nobody to place his faith on. He is afraid, insecure, suspicious about everyone and everything.

We live under the false illusion of having everything under our control. The spirit of getting things done becomes a problem when we continue to cling on even after we have exhorted all our efforts. We are overwhelmed by a sense of despair and disillusion when things move beyond our control. It is at this stage we need to learn to let go. Several times relationships are broken just because we tried too hard to make them work. We didn't give the breathing space they required to grow. We didn't let go and let them take their own course.

Professionally or personally, once all the efforts are made towards achieving a goal, we must learn to let go and let life take the best course. It might or might not be of one's choice, but if we have faith, we will realise that it inevitably is the best course. We need to believe that forces above us are far better equipped to make judgments for us. We must learn to have faith in their judgment. Letting go, however, does not mean turning into a fatalist. One cannot sit idle in life and expect life to take care of itself. Karma, the fulfilment of one's duties is the ultimate objective of all human existence and if we fail to fulfill our duties towards life, life inevitably fails us.

When God gives us dreams, He shares them with us. Whatever we consider our dreams, are actually His dreams and He gives us the capability to realise them. The part we are required to play is to ensure the optimum usage of the capabilities bestowed upon us. And once we have played our part with utmost honesty and effort, we need to let go, step aside and let God step in to fulfill our dreams. After all, they are His dreams, too.

Looking to join a Course / Job Guarantee Program - BEWARE or BE AWARE

Thumb Rule # 1: DON'T BELIEVE IN ANYONE WHO ASKS YOU TO PAY MONEY FOR OFFERING A JOB. 

Companies don't need to take any money from you PERIOD. They might tell you hundreds of stories like they are taking money as a 'Security Deposit' or for 'Infrastructure or Development' purposes. Don't trust them. If they don't have enough money for their 'Infrastructure or Development,' they don't deserve to run their company!!! Instead, trust a company which doesn't ask a penny from you even if it is a start-up company. You can work for FREE (or for a very less salary) if you want to get some work experience. That is Okay, but never pay money from your pocket for any reason. In worst-case scenarios, if you are paying money, don't forget to take a signed paper (On their Company Notepad with the signature from an official) or a valid bank receipt from them in which it's clearly written that you have paid the money as a refundable security deposit and it should also have the Terms & Conditions. 

Thumb Rule # 2: DON'T BELIEVE IN ANY 'JOB GUARANTEE' PROGRAMS FROM TRAINING INSTITUTES. 99.0 % OF THEM DON'T KEEP THEIR PROMISES.

It has become a trend that many companies/institutes asking jobless people to pay 50,000 (or more) and they will pay you back 2,000 per month. Just think logically how foolish this actually sounds. For 1 year, they will be paying you (2000 x 12=) 24,000. So, you are essentialy working FREE for them for more than 2 years. In other words, they will be giving you a part of the amount that you have paid to them initially. And they will be enjoying the interest on your money. These institutes promise you a lot of things when you go for counseling. They will show their past record of placing people in MNC companies and they will tell you the list of companies that come there for the placement. Don't get deceived by them. All those promises will go in vain the moment you pay the money. In the worst-case scenario, if you must join, then enquire with the students who are studying there and who already studied there. (You can know any regrets from those who are currently studying there and you will know the pros and cons from the people who already studied there. Try to get feedback from those who achieved the job and those who couldn't get the job after the completion of the course.) Unveiling the Secret :- From earlier experiences, It is known that, typically some good training institutes could place those candidates who meet with the company's eligibility criteria such as the engineering branch/stream you have done and the percentage criteria through out the candidate's career. These institutes will lure freshers showing the past records and allows everybody to join the course initially but they keep mum on this issue until you demand the reason why they couldn't place YOU. Remember, even the good institutes are running on a profit basis and NOT on a service basis! It's always good to get trained in some of the latest technologies and it improves your chance of getting a job. But don't join any institute based on their promise of giving you a job. When you want to join an institute, remember to enquire with the student who have taken courses and observe their infrastructure, lab availability timings, and their faculties. Some institutes train you using their previous batch students as faculties/trainers. Be careful!!! Preferably, join a branded institute as they maintain quality of education to some level. But generally they are expensive to afford as they try to maintain their quality. Remember, no institute is at your service! Everything is a business. You cannot change that, but you need to be careful.

Thumb Rule # 3: KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN 'PLACEMENT ASSISTANCE' AND 'PLACEMENT GUARANTEE'.

There is a subtle difference between 'Placement Assistance' and 'Placement Guarantee'. The former one means that they will help you to get a job, but no guarantee. If you observe the advertisements carefully, most of them mention '100% Placement Assistance'. Later they can always escape saying that they never guaranteed a job. Even if they do, there will be a famous super star saying "* Conditions Apply !" :-). Ask them what those conditions are. When some institute says 'Placement Guarantee', ask them to mention it in written and give it to you. (No body can dare to give you. They cleverly say that how can we assure you a job if you don't learn anything. Or they will ask you not to join the course if you don't have the trust on them and they can even say that, there are hundreds of candidates who are pursuing the course and they will slap a question back to you whether they are all fools to join that institute. What will be your reaction? ) See to it that it's clearly mentioned in that document WHAT IF they can't provide you a job. Also tell them that you will pay the money the next moment they provide you a job (Since they are anyway saying job is guaranteed, ask them what's the problem with this...:-)). Some institutes say that they will recruit you based on your performance in training. This is even more fishy. They can always escape later saying your performance is not up to the mark (Despite of you performing very good) and walk away with your money. Be careful. In the worst case, if you are paying money, see to it that you pay in installments. (At least, it will save you from losing your entire money). If their training is really good, you will anyway pay the remaining money. Otherwise, you can escape with the least damage. Hope you will keep in mind that I've asked you to join an institute mainly to learn the technology and not for their job guarantee scheme. So when you want to learn, join the best! It may even fetch you a job! 

Thumb Rule # 4: DON'T ATTEND THE WRITTEN TESTS/INTERVIEWS THAT ASK YOU TO PAY REGISTRATION FEE. 99.0 % OF THEM ARE FAKE.

An exception is the Government companies. They require some registration fee. That's OK. Remember that good/branded companies never ask you for registration fees. They don't need it. If they are taking money, there is something fishy. Don't pay registration fee unless you are totally convinced. Just walkout if you think something.

Thumb Rule # 5: DON'T BELIEVE ANYONE WHO SAYS THEY CAN GET YOU THROUGH COMPANIES BY 'BACK-DOOR'.

People in the companies are not senseless to recruit candidates in illegal ways and put them and their own company in trouble. Don't believe if someone says he knows the HR or Project Manager of a company and can provide you job through back door. In the best case, one may get a job if the candidate directly knows high level people and he/she meets all the eligibility criteria of the company and the candidate is talented enough to get a job but he/she didn't get an opportunity to prove his/her ability. But remember, there is no bypass to the process of the company. Process is rigid and it is because of the process, a company grows or shrinks! It's better and happy to stay away from such back door offers instead of getting troubled by them. Think!

Thumb Rule # 6: DON'T BELIEVE IN ANY OF THE 'ONLINE TYPING JOBS' OR 'SMART JOBS' THAT ASK YOU TO PAY SOME MONEY TO EARN MORE.

If they give it for free, then you may think about it. (But, such jobs are to be discouraged ,because you will lose your will to get into a good job that matches your profile.) Better, simply ignore. Don't pay even a single paisa. They lure you saying you have to pay 500 Rs (or more) initial payment to earn thousands of money every day ! All that is simply trash. You will be wasting your time and you won't earn even a single paisa after paying your/your parents' hard-earned money.

Thumb Rule # 7: THINK TWICE BEFORE PAYING MONEY TO ANY OF THE JOB SITES.

Don't believe in Premier Memberships, Online Tests that require you to pay money. That's just eye wash stuff and will not fetch you any job if you don't have right talent. If you have talent, you will anyway get that job even without the help of those programs. Even if they send your resume to 1,000 companies or 10,000 companies, the companies won't recruit you unless they have vacancies and you are suitable for those positions. If someone says they succeeded through some job program, just think what is the percentage of people succeeded in getting jobs through that program. I don't think it will be more than 1 %. I am not saying all programs are fake ones. But my advice for you is to think twice before you spend your hard-earned money on some job programs. Remember that companies pay money for those job sites if you get selected through them. In such case, there is no need to collect money from you.

Thumb Rule # 8: DON'T SUBMIT/HANDOVER YOUR ORIGINAL EDUCATIONAL CERTIFICATES (OR ANY ORIGINAL DOCUMENTS).

Also, don't submit/handover your original educational certificates (or any original documents) unless it is a very good company and its mandatory for all employees working there. If you are submitting the documents, make sure you get a written proof that they have taken them as per the policy of their organization. (F.Y.I., Good companies never insist their employees to handover originals to them. They generally ask you to bring them during joining period to cross check with the photocopies of the same.)

If you blindly believe somebody's words without following the above guidelines then, you will be in serious trouble later when you want to leave the company. Many freshers have suffered because of this. Hope you don't get into trouble.

REASONS FOR REJECTION IN THE INTERVIEW

1. Poor attitude. Many candidates come across as arrogant. While employers can afford to be self-centered, candidates cannot.

2. Appearance. Many candidates do not consider their appearance as much as they should. First impressions are quickly made in the first three to five minutes. (For more info regarding Appearance, refer to the message 'Interview Etiquette' which I am going to post in the next post).

3. Lack of research. It's obvious when candidates haven't learned about the job, company or industry prior to the interview. Visit the library or use the Internet to research the company, then talk with friends, peers and other professionals about the opportunity before each meeting.

4. Not having questions to ask. Asking questions shows your interest in the company and the position. Prepare a list of intelligent questions in advance.

5. Not readily knowing the answers to interviewers' questions. Anticipate and rehearse answers to tough questions about your background, such as recent termination or an employment gap. Practicing with your spouse or a friend before the interview will help you to frame intelligent responses.

6. Relying too much on resumes. Employees hire people, not paper. Although a resume can list qualifications and skills, it's the interview dialogue that will portray you as a committed, responsive team player.

7. Too much humility. Being conditioned not to brag, candidates are sometimes reluctant to describe their accomplishments. Explaining how you reach difficult or impressive goals helps portray you as a committed, responsive team player.

8. Not relating skills to employers' needs. A list of sterling accomplishments means little if you can't relate them to a company's requirements. Reiterate your skills and convince the employer that you can "do the same for them".

9. Handling salary issues ineptly. Candidates often ask about salary and benefit packages too early. If they believe an employer is interested, they may demand inappropriate amounts and price themselves out of the jobs. Candidates who ask for too little undervalue themselves or appear desperate.

10. Lack of career direction. Job hunters who aren't clear about their career goals often can't spot or commit to appropriate opportunities. Not knowing what you want wastes everybody's time.

11. Job shopping. Some applicants, particularly those in certain high-tech, sales and marketing fields, will admit they're just "shopping" for opportunities and have little intention of changing jobs. This wastes time and leaves a bad impression with employers they may need to contact in the future.

Main Focus Areas in Any Personal Interview

* Personal details
* Academic details
* Your background
* Current affairs


Commandments for every personal interview

Even after months of preparation, some candidates do not perform well inside the interview room.The trick is to follow the below commandments practice them during mock interview sessions diligently. You are sure to crack the personal interview.

1. Whenever the interviewer asks any questions, listen carefully. Do not interrupt him midway. Ask for a clarification if the question is not clear. Wait a second or two before you answer. And don't dive into the answer!

2. Speak clearly. Don't speak very slowly. Be loud enough so that the interviewers don't have to strain their ears.

3. Brevity is the hallmark of a good communicator. An over-talkative or verbose person is disliked and misjudged instantly, so keep it short.

4. If you don't know an answer, be honest. The interviewer will respect your integrity and honesty. Never exaggerate.

5. Never boast about your achievements. Don't be overconfident -- it is often misinterpreted by interviewers for arrogance.

6. Don't get into an argument with the interviewer on any topic. Restrain yourself, please!

7. Remember your manners. Project an air of humility and be polite.

8. Project enthusiasm. The interviewer usually pays more attention if you display enthusiasm in whatever you say.

9. Maintain a cheerful disposition throughout the interview, because a pleasant countenance holds the interviewers' interest.

10. Maintain perfect eye contact with all panel members; make sure you address them all. This shows your self-confidence and honesty.

11. Avoid using slang. It may not be understood and will certainly not be appreciated.

12. Avoid frequent use of words and phrases like, 'I mean'; 'You know'; 'I know'; 'Well'; 'As such'; 'Fine'; 'Basically', etc.

13. When questions are asked in English, reply in English only. Do not use Hindi or any other languages. Avoid using Hindi words like matlab, ki, maine, etc.

14. Feel free to ask questions if necessary. It is quite in order and much appreciated by interviewers.

15. Last but not the least, be natural. Many interviewees adopt a stance that is not their natural self. Interviewers find it amusing when a candidate launches into a new accent that s/he cannot sustain consistently through the interview or adopts a mannerism that is inconsistent with their own personality.It is best to talk naturally. You come across as genuine.


Mind your body language!
1. Do not keep shifting your position.
2. Your posture during the interview adds to or diminishes your personality. Be a little conscious of your posture and gestures. They convey a lot about your personality.
3. Sit straight. Keep your body still. You may, of course, use your hand gestures freely.
4. Avoid these mannerisms at all costs:

- Playing with your tie
- Theatrical gestures
- Shaking legs
- Sitting with your arms slung over the back of the adjoining chair


Post interview etiquette
1. Make sure you thank the interviewers as a mark of respect for the time they have spared for you.
2. As you rise and are about to leave, make sure you collect up your pen/ pencil/ all other stationery.
3. After getting up, place your chair in its original position.


The last word
1. Some institutes (like the Faculty of Management Studies) ask you to deliver an extempore speech suddenly while the interview is going on. Be mentally prepared for the same.
2. Competition will be very tough. Every mistake you commit will turn into an advantage for the other candidates. Hence, be very particular about your preparation. Do not leave anything to chance or the last minute.
3. Remember you have to sell yourself in an interview.
4. Be very particular about what you write in your resume. Check and re-check your resume for facts, spelling errors, etc. Ensure that there are no grammatical errors in the descriptive type questions in the sheet.